Let Me Hold Your Hand On Your Journey Back To Self

Inhale deep into your belly and your lungs. Exhale all of the air out. 

Inhaling deep down into your being. Exhaling all.

Sister Wound

We exist in a world where women are divided. You don't have to look far to see it. As a woman, you have probably experienced the deep cut of the 'Sister-Wound,' even if you didn't have a name for it. The head-to-toe look that women give to one another, silently evaluating if the stranger in front of them is competition

Patriarchal Society

The sister wound is something that most women don't talk about. It is the manifestation of women living in a patriarchal society who have had to use unhealthy coping mechanisms to survive. We then continue to pass on the sister wound from one generation to the next. Essentially, the 'Sister-Wound' is the hurt, wariness, or discomfort countless women feel when relating to other women. 


Programming

Junior high and high school are where many of us start to judge our peers for their bodies, for how sexual they are or are not, and for how they walk, talk and dress. For some of us, this programming took place earlier in life.

How the Sister Wound Manifests

Jealousy, self-doubt, spitefulness, judgment, and apprehension — are all ways that the 'sister wound' reveals itself in relationships with other women. Rather than seeing women as sisters and allies, many of us look at each other as opponents, a rival, or sources of destruction for what is ours.


I Don’t Want To Live This Way Anymore

Patriarchs were aware and afraid of the female's ability and power to command peace and harmony among all living beings, which didn't suit their agenda of owning and controlling their reality. To gain control, a carefully concocted combination of patriarchal religions, brute force, and fear-mongering were used to divide women and split peaceful societies from one another. Women either had to submit or disappear back to the woods. As knights conquered new lands, Priestesses and the Men who backed their beliefs and religions of harmony; slipped quietly into the woods. For the rest, life became a game of survival, and unfortunately, the game was designed for men, not women. For years, women have been taught not to trust each other. The patriarchal structures of modern society have led us to turn against each other, betray each other and obsess about things like our appearance, our weight or whether we are being liked.

These were excellent ways to decrease the incredible primal power that exists in our bodies, our pleasure, and how it births life, metaphorically and physically, and an even better way to stop women with the power of pleasure and life in their bodies from coming together as one force. As a result, most of us grow up with loneliness in our hearts; we long for deep, connected, and nourishing friendships, but we push them away because of our past experiences with women.

Can you imagine what the world would look like if we stopped evaluating each other and started working together? Before patriarchy and the rise of the media, women depended on other women. There was a time long ago when women lived a community-focused life instead of judging thy neighbor for their child-rearing decisions. There was a time when we were gathered together when we weren't putting each other down, where there wasn't a need to belittle. Women gathered at the water hole, ate together at the table, and gathered in nature, cultivating healing experiences, listening to one another, and learning from each other's wisdom. There was a time when women worked collaboratively in our villages and kept our families safe from harm. A time when we communicated for the sake of collaboration and growth and not for division and toxic debates. There was a time when we weren't afraid of each other's powers because we knew that every one of us is powerful in our own ways. A time when women were leaders, and we understood that it truly takes a village.

Do you judge other women for the way they dress, think, or conduct themselves? 

Do you find yourself speaking over others or speaking loudly? 

Do you have a fear of rejection or exclusion? 

Are you constantly criticizing yourself for the way you look, feel, or what you have achieved? 

Do you have difficulty trusting other women, especially those you're unfamiliar with? 

Do you struggle to hold conversations and speak up? 

Do you feel an inability to be assertive or stand up for yourself? 

Do you believe other women are better or 'more' than you? 

Do you ever experience jealousy or envy towards other women? 

Do you have a loud inner critic? 

Do you find yourself in circles of negative self-talk? 

Do you lack self-love? 

Do you play small in fear of upsetting others or standing out? 

Do you have trouble feeling vulnerable or uniquely expressing yourself? 

Do you ignore important conversations or topics out of fear of simply having them to begin with?

These are all symptoms of the sisters wound. To shine a light on this pattern with compassion and curiosity while recognizing that much of this stems from intergenerational trauma and conditioning.

To be open to doing inner work. Shadow work can be a particular healing modality for sister wounds because you must first love yourself to love other women. To reconnect to our feminine energy or 'femininity.'

To light the way for the women of the future. 

To heal the 'sister wound,' we must recognize that it exists. Meet 'it' where 'it' is with other females. Confront 'it,' the shadow that follows us, making us feel as though we're constantly being watched and analyzed by other women. Us against 'it.' When we look to one another and let go of the fear of judgment, humiliation, and competition, we can allow friendships that were once never possible. By sitting in circle, figuratively and/or literally, and acknowledging the fragments of ourselves that carry a wound, we can heal for the past, present, and future.

By sitting in circle, figuratively and/or literally, and acknowledging the fragments of ourselves that carry a wound, we can heal for the past, present, and future.

The clarity you long for is just around the corner.

When we come together in sisterhood

we come to realize that as women,

taking leaps of faith into the unknown;

is embedded in our DNA,

rooted in our core,

all the way down into our womb. 

It can feel foreign, but the beauty is in the discovery.

You don’t have to walk this path alone. Imagine yourself and a group of close sisters weaving nature into your hair and running up the hill for a gathering under the tree.

  • As children, many of us have a close friend, some multiple and it’s not uncommon that somewhere down the line we lose one of those friends.

  • As teens, some of us lose a friend to something that is life altering. It’s not uncommon that a boy comes in the middle of the friendship.

  • When this happens, we build walls around us. Perhaps if it never happened, you still built walls as a protective barrier from the outside world.

    As adults we no longer function in the same vulnerable authentic ways that we did as children. We look at the world through the leases we’ve developed over the years.

    Connection and community serve as a guide back to source.